So at that camp there are these ladies that prepare the food for us, and half of them were on some kind of foreign exchange program from other countries so they could see the USA.  What sucks for them is that they probably didn’t realize they’d be stuck in some kitchen in the middle of upstate NY most of the time and not actually seeing much cool stuff.  They got a pretty shitty deal if you ask me.

But whatever.  Two of these girls were very hot – one was from Sweden, and the other was from Brazil.

Now every time that we went to get food, breakfast lunch and dinner, these ladies would be there serving it and cleaning up after us and everything, and basically they were much hotter than any of the women attending our weird camp.. so all the guys would talk about them.

So I was like, shit.. I gotta try to work game on at least one of them.  I mean, how often do I get a chance to try to hook up with a legit hot chick with a sexy foreign accent who can barely speak english?! And since they were out in the middle of nowhere, you can be pretty damn sure that they were horny and not gettin’ any.

So I started chatting with the Brazilian one one day at lunch, just saying hi and asking some basic questions about where she was from… her english was terrible so it was a bit of a challenge to communicate.  So I had to rely on a lot of eye contact and smiling and stuff.. which is all good for pickup anyway, so not too much of an issue.

They ended up getting invited to play some games with us that week and also there was some kind of cheesy dance party we threw one night that they came to.

So at the dance party I got to talking to her out on the deck, and she seemed pretty interested because she was sticking around me a lot and smiling and all this stuff.. so I felt like it was going well.  I started touching her a little and she was receptive to it, so after about a half hour of standing around struggling to communicate I asked her if she wanted to go walk around outside.

We walked down to some gazebo and started making out, which was sweet.  Then we went back to the party, I guess because I was a pussy and didn’t want to move too fast.

So the next night we had a big fire where everybody went outside to play drums and cook s’mores and whatever, and the girls came to that too.  So all night we sat next to each other being all cute, and then once everybody had gone to bed I went and grabbed a sleeping bag and we hooked up and she blew me in the sleeping bag.  Woohoo!  I didn’t have any condoms, so who knows I probably could have banged her but whatever.

Then we fell asleep, and when we woke up around 4am it was fucking FREEZING and I thought I was possibly going to die of cold.  I clearly remember it being so cold that I could hardly think of anything besides getting inside.  So I drove her back to her cabin and then I went to sleep in mine.

I got her email address, and tried to look her up on facebook the other day but no luck.  Oh well.

While analyzing my list of girls I’ve hooked up with, it’s clear to me that I went through a serious slump after the debacle that happened with numbers 8 and 9.  I don’t know if I had some kind of mental block or what, but I’m pretty sure that that experience set me back a few months in my learning curve.  My social circle was pretty much destroyed, and with that went my sources of  sex.

You see, as I was first learning pickup, pretty much all the hookups I got were through some kind of social circle, or just being in the right place at the right time.  I had no game.  Straight up, I couldn’t seduce a lamp-post.  I was just getting more accustomed to putting myself out there into the arena, and when you go out partying all the time, you’re literally bound to run into someone who will bang out.  Just by sheer luck really.

So for the next couple months, I was working on a couple different girls but I kept encountering this issue where I was deathly afraid to escalate.  I still kick myself for this when reading this list, because I missed out on a MAJOR hottie that was really into me that I met in one of my classes.. but due to chodeliness and lack of balls, I waited way way too long to make a move on her.  I got dropped into the friend zone, and when I finally got the balls to make a move, my window of acceptable sexual escalation was long closed and I got rejected.  Hard.  It was awkward.

So I learned my lesson.  You have to close.  You have to escalate. HAVE TO.  There is no seduction without physical escalation, and you have to constantly be moving forward.

But it really took me a good few months if not over a year to get that issue handled.. Resulting in mostly sexless life and frustration.  And sometimes, going after girls that were way beneath my standards due to sheer frustration with the fact that I could not get laid.  My self-esteem was taking a beating as I was trying to meet these new women and just getting rejected quite a bit.  It sucked.

Basically, I barely remember what happened with #10.  All I know is that it was the summer between my sophomore and junior year, and I was hanging out with some kids I knew from high school, and one of them was this nice girl who was cool to hang out with, but she was really unfortunate looking.  A little overweight, wore way too much makeup, naturally unattractive face… etc.

Bottom line, I was drunk off my ass and banged her in a car, or something.  I honestly don’t remember because after I realized what I had done, I didn’t want to think about fucking her ever again, so I’ve pretty much blocked this out of my memory.  It definitely happened, but I do not know the details.

Chalk this one up to a stupid, drunk fuck.

This is actually my first experience with banging a chick I was totally not attracted to, though there will be a few more of these stories to come.. especially the next few girls I banged while I was getting out of my slump. Basically I had almost an entire year of banging infrequently and low quality girls before I started to get to the next level in my game.  And that’s when shit got awesome.

So, double-digits.  In the least glorious fashion!

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Basically, this girl was totally nuts.  She wasn’t the most attractive girl, I’d say she was about 10-15 lbs overweight, but she was only like 18 so it wasn’t really that bad.  Her face was nothing special either.  But what I really enjoyed about this girl is that she was just fucking hilarious.  Like every time she would walk into a room everybody would kind of turn to her because she was constantly the center of attention.  It may be hard to describe this type of person, but she exists and everybody was pretty entertained by her.

So anyway, I love these types of people who can really work a room, and she was one of them.  It made me want to fuck her mercilessly, despite the fact that she was like a straight up 6 on the rating scale.

So we’d all go out as friends and get blackout drunk and then end up hooking up or something, and one night I just kind of woke up in her bed and it was pretty funny.  But to be completely honest I kind of liked this girl.  Which is weird to say, because now my standards are definitely higher and I’d never really be attracted to a 6 like that.  But back then I had a little less confidence in myself so I was happy to be occasionally gettin it.

What sucked was that she was totally nuts, so every time she’d get drunk she’d act all into me, but then in the morning she’d pretend like she didn’t like me any more and make these retarded jokes about how she hated waking up when I was there.  Which is perfectly justifiable, I should have gone up to my goddamn room after banging her.  But whatever, I was retarded and still learning the ropes to this stuff.

So anyway, I could tell that she was starting to like me and playing these games to try to get me more attached to her, and then I ended up banging one of her best friends.  As described in the last post I linked to at the top.

She found out, and basically gave me the dirtiest looks I’ve ever received in my life for the next two years. It was pretty terrible.  I actually felt pretty bad, because that bitch could be seriously scornful… and she was one of my pretty good friends while that was going on.  It sucked.

Soooo I guess the moral of the story, similar to the last story, is not to fuck around with girls who are best friends unless you really don’t care about never seeing them again.  Argh.

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So it was sophomore year of college and my best friend D had met this freshman chick the first couple weeks that we were there.  He started hooking up with her, and we got to be friends with all these freshman kids that lived on her floor (we were all in the same dorm).  So we were going out with these kids all the time, partying like crazy, getting blackout drunk and making terrible decisions.  Making out with multiple chicks at the same time in basement frat parties and doing all the dumb shit that college kids do.  It was a fucking blast.

D started getting a little more serious with this girl over the next couple months, and they became official boyfriend/girlfriend status and everything.  Now I was also becoming good friends with his girlfriend, and I was hooking up with her best friend (who will be in the next post).  It was a pretty crazy environment where everybody was flirting with everybody else and hooking up all the time and all I was concerned with was fucking anything that walked, as fast as I possibly could.

I finally started feeling like I was getting to be a real pimp and starting to see some good success with the pickup artist stuff I’d been studying for almost a year at that point.  However, I still was at this point of extreme emotional immaturity where I didn’t really have confidence in myself to pull a lot of hot girls, so any chance I got I would take.

So basically, there was a lot of sexual tension that had always existed between myself and D’s girlfriend.  It tends to happen between a girlfriend and any guys around because that’s just how sexual tension works.  If there are barriers that wouldn’t allow you and a girl to hook up (another great example is two people who work together.. which is why people who work together are always hooking up secretly) then it just seems safer for the two of you to flirt with each other, because it’s all “safe” … or something.

But then you introduce extreme amounts of alcohol into the mix, and the fact that we were like 19, and what do you get… barriers that are broken down.  Also, I’m a complete douche and I made a serious mistake.

So, one night I was extremely drunk and so was D’s girlfriend, and D was nowhere to be found.  So we started talking about some shit and getting closer to each other and talking about how much we like each other and then she blew me.

And at that point I was basically in kill mode, and decided that I had to have her completely and fuck her.  I realized consciously that this was a terrible thing to do to D, but I guess I just didn’t give a shit, or understand the value of a friend over some dumb bitch.  So the next night the same thing basically happened (because we drank to near blackout pretty much every night) and I ended up fucking her.

It was good sex, very emotional obviously and very forbidden.  But it was not worth it.

The next day she ended up telling some people because she felt too guilty about it, and for the most part I lost a lot of friends out of that group of people.  So did D, because as it turned out, one night while his girlfriend was passed out in the same bed as one of her other best girl friends (who happened to be a total whore), he got in bed with them and had sex with his girlfriend’s friend.  While his girlfriend was in the same bed, asleep. HA.

So basically we were both fucked, and though D was quite pissed at me for banging his girlfriend, everybody else was more pissed off at D for pulling off such a ridiculous act of infidelity.  So D and I both are hated by about 10-15 people in that dormitory now, though I haven’t really seen any of them in a while.  But we got a pretty bad reputation for being total scumbags.

This really sucked because I lost some good guy friends on that floor out of the deal, and I also lost the trust of my best friend, though we ended up working it out after a while and becoming pretty good friends again.

For the record, that shit’s just not worth it.  This for me is the ultimate example of not shitting where you eat.  You have to have boundaries in your life.  Hopefully I’ll never make a mistake like that again.

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But about a year later that girl had joined a sorority and invited me to go with her to some kind of date night. I was down, thought I might get to fuck her again and if not I’d meet some of her sorority sisters.

Now I don’t remember why at this point, but for some reason she also had another date going.  It was a guy I was pretty cool with and had known from being on the crew team together a few years earlier.  So whatever, it wasn’t a big deal because I was still really just going to try to meet some of her sorority sisters and try to bang them out.

Before I went, it was necessary that I get extremely hammered because I didn’t know most of the girls in this sorority yet, so I didn’t want it to be awkward.  So I loaded up on Everclear and Amp energy drink before I went.  This is a recipe for blacking out.

The event itself was held at a bar, and about an hour into the event all I can remember is me sitting on a barstool passing in and out of consciousness due to extreme alcohol intake.  My date was nowhere to be found, and I was basically just hanging out with one of my roommates who happened to be going with another girl.

Later that night I got a call from my date who apologized for dipping out, and asked me if I wanted to come over to her place.  I said, sure why not.  Sounds like a solid invite to fuck.

I got there, and we started hooking up.  But she kept saying she had to go to the bathroom and disappearing for like 5 minutes at a time.  It was really weird.  Like, I kept getting down to her pussy and ready to fuck, and then she’d miraculously have to go to the bathroom again.  I thought she was like fucking with me or something.  After waiting another 5 minutes and being thoroughly pissed off with blue balls, I decided that “fuck it” I’m just going to peace out before she gets back from the bathroom.

I went home and told my roommates about the baffling disappearances into the bathroom… I was thoroughly confused, and pissed because I was still horny.

So, the next day I ran into the dude who was her other date.  We talked about what happened the night before, I told him I basically didn’t remember most of it because I was blacked out.  He told me that he ended up leaving early with her and banging her out at her apartment.

No shit.  I told him that she invited me over later to fuck but that some weird shit was going on so I ended up peacing out.  Good thing too, I didn’t want to be that guy’s sloppy seconds.  What a whore!

So THEN I come home and my roommate tells me that he talked to my date’s roommate, who said that my date was on her period yesterday and ended up getting a tampon stuck in her vagina.  Is that even possible?

So basically what we pieced together was that the other guy (who was a very big dude) must have banged her and trapped her tampon inside her pussy, which might explain why she kept disappearing to the bathroom when I was there.

Bottom line, that chick was a sliiiizzzzzuuttttttttttt!

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It was my sophomore year of college and I was meeting a lot of people all the time.  Well, I happened to meet two girls who lived on the floor below me and were friends with some of my friends.

These girls were cute – both brunettes, one was like a half-italian, half-spanish and the other was polish.  Anyway, they were very outwardly flirtatious.  The half-italian girl was always making sexually suggestive comments and flirtatious eye contact with guys, including myself.  And she would spend a little extra time talking to me whenever we ran into each other, making comments like “you’re cute” etc.  So I knew it was definitely feasible that I could hook up with her, and her friend seemed pretty flirtatious as well though she was more quiet.

So one sunday evening when nothing was going on, I ended up going down to their room to hang out and see what they were up to.  They started doing some frisky stuff like grabbing my ass and being kind of aggressive towards me.

Awesome.  I knew that, like usual, all I had to do was not mess it up.  These girls were horny, and so long as I didn’t act like a fool or say anything stupid, they might just take it out on me.

So I ended up sitting on the polish girl’s bed and we started talking about sex or kissing or something like that, and all of a sudden we were making out.  Sweet.

Now the italian/spanish girl was sitting on the laptop on the other side of the room and starts getting jealous.  “Hey! None of that in here!”  and basically to that the polish girl said “No, come here” in this sexy little voice… and now I had 2 girls kind of perched over top of me.

Well, one of them started touching my dick and I resumed making out with the polish girl.  They were now unzipping my pants and taking my dick out.

At this point I was starting to question whether I was actually living in reality or just making this shit up.  But I assure you, it was really happening.

So I grab one girl’s head and push it down towards my cock and she starts blowing me while I make out with the other one and grab both of their tits.  They take my pants off and now they’re both going to town down there, biting my thighs and sucking on my balls, my dick.. whatever.  Needless to say, I was sporting one of the most giant boners of my life and this felt ridiculously awesome.

I specifically remember thinking “This may be the greatest moment of my life.”

I actually took a really long time to blow a load, because I think I’d just been jerking off before I headed down there.  So they started getting bored, and one of them went back to the laptop while the other finished me off.  Then I headed back to my room, mission accomplished.

I later banged the polish chick but that’s another story that I’ll have to write separately, because it has a rather entertaining twist.

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One night we were all hammered and hopping from one house party to another, and D’s older sister told me that I should try to hook up with her friend.  Her friend was a little indian girl with a cute face and a pretty tight body.  I was definitely down.  I just wanted to fuck anything.  I was horny as shit.

“Great, let’s do it” I said.

She went off and started chatting giddily with her Indian friend.  Sweet… I knew all I had to do was play it cool and not really mess anything up.  D’s sister was doing all the leg work for me.

We got back to their house, and the indian girl and I ended up awkwardly hanging out in her room.  I was still very unsure of myself, so basically I was scared to make the right move when the time came.  I found myself sitting on her bed at 3am strumming her acoustic guitar and pondering how I could make a move on this girl without embarrassing myself or getting rejected.  I was ultimately concerned with not looking like a creep, and with not getting rejected.

She sat down on the bed next to me and we were kind of touching shoulders. I thought to myself.  “Fuck, this is it.  I have to make a move now or forever be held in creepy friend status.”

I looked over at her and said “Hey.”  She looked up, I met her eyes and kissed her.  We started making out pretty heavily, then she got up to close the door and turned the lights off, and we fucked.  That made her the sixth woman I’d slept with.  Awesome.

Three years later, I was talking to my cousin who went to the same school as us and was the indian girl’s age.  It turns out that her future boyfriend was his future roommate, and my cousin hated this dude with a serious passion.  So when the guy really pissed him off one day, my cousin responded with a one-liner text message that was pretty good.  “Yeah?  Well, my cousin fucked your girlfriend.”

Boooooom.  I’m glad when my sexual exploits spread cheer throughout the world

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You see, my freshman year I was an idiot and decided to live in the honors student dorms.  Which basically meant, I was surrounded by nerds and the least hot girls I could have asked to be surrounded by.  Also, my roommate was completely boring and never partied at all.

Sophomore year, I was going to be living with my best friend from high school (we’ll call him D.) D was a menace to society, and had already banged a ton of girls.  Way more than me, that’s for sure.  He was a true natural.  So I knew it was going to be a much wilder year than the one before… and I was absolutely right.

So the first week that we were hanging out at school, D meets some freshman girl in a cafe across the street from our dorms.  She’s this extra-hot little spanish girl with a nearly perfect body.  She was about 5 foot nothing, probably around 100 lbs, and C or D-sized titties.  Cute face, tight little ass.

And she was really chill.She’d just broken up with her boyfriend who’d been with her through all of high school, and she was down to have some fun.  Awesome.

So the night that he met her, D invited this girl over to smoke week in our dorm room.  The three of us took some shots of jack daniels and went wandering around campus.  It seemed like she was into both of us, though D had dibs on her since he was the one who met her and everything.  So I ended up hanging out in somebody else’s dorm that night.

Later that night I come home and he told me that he banged her out after I left.  Excellent work, D.

Now a couple nights later, she ended up coming over to hang out again and for some reason D went off to do something else, so I was hanging out with her.  We were flirting and taking shots in my dorm room, and I definitely felt like I could make a move, but it felt weird because D had already banged her earlier that week.

So I’m kinda dragging my heels, and it starts to feel kinda weird, like when that window of opportunity is about to pass you by.  And then she comes out with this:

“So, you wanna have sex?”

Wow.  Holy shit.  Am I in a movie?

“Uhh.. Yeah.  Definitely.”

I was fucking nervous as hell.  HAHA.

So I just walked over to her and we started making out.  We took our clothes off, and I banged her out.  Her titties were some of the most amazing, perfectly shaped, perfectly 18-year-old giant boobies on a tight frame style tits I’ve maybe ever seen.

The sex wasn’t all that great.  I was pretty inexperienced at that point and definitely didn’t know what I was doing.  But who gives a shit.  Watching those titties bounce around was wonderful…

Then we put our clothes back on and walked out of the room to go do something else.

God bless college girls.

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So it turns out that they were both staying at the redhead’s place that night because her parents were away.  Perfect!  We brought over some wine and the four of us started drinking and watching tv and just hanging out.

Well, my buddy ended up drinking so much wine that he passed out.  Also, the asian girl went into a bedroom and it seemed like she was going to sleep too.

It was me and the redhead left awake, and I started getting a little physical with her on the couch… we started making out, then went to her room.  Sweet.  However, she wouldn’t let me get into her pants, and when I tried to get her to blow me she said that she has some weird condition where her jaw won’t expand.. like lockjaw or something.  I was like, what the fuck you’re clearly lying.  But she stuck to the story, so… whatever.

I sucked on her giant tits for a while and kept trying to get into her pants, to no avail.  Dammit.

I decided to go to the bathroom.

On my way there, I passed the asian girl’s room and decided to see if she was awake.  I walked in.

“Hey.  You awake?”

“Hi.  Sort of.  What’s up?”

“Umm.. nothing.  Just kinda bored.  I’m still up drinking.  Drink more!”

I sat down on her bed and put my arm around her while handing her my glass of wine.  She took a sip.  I looked at her and went in to kiss her.  She kissed me back.

We started hooking up pretty seriously.  I took her shirt off and sucked on her tiny asian nipples.  I grabbed her firm asian ass.

She was putting up no resistance.

I started fingering her.  I took her pants off.  I fingered her more and made out with her.  I sucked on her titties more. I put a condom on.  We had sex.

We talked afterwards while holding each other.  I actually kind of liked this girl.  I’d known her for a long time and we’d always flirted back and forth.  And finally, almost 6 years after we first met, we fucked each other.

I was hoping that we could turn it into a regular thing.  That would be pretty awesome.  She was hot.. even though she went to school a few states away, and school was starting up again pretty soon.

We fell asleep.

In the morning, I could see the two girls talking to each other.  I knew what they were discovering.

They weren’t really in the mood to talk after that.  My friend and I left.

The next semester I found out that she had transferred to an extremely strict christian college where religion was a major part of the curriculum.  The kind of school where kids don’t drink or do drugs, they just sit around talking about God all the time.  Later that year, I checked her facebook and she was dating this 90-pound balding kid who wrote lovey-dovey messages on her facebook wall every day.

Two years later, after graduating college, I checked her facebook wall again.  She had just married the dude and now she had all these pictures of herself with these SMOKING HOT women around her.  What the hell was that about?

After some further research, I found out that she’s now a cheerleader for an NFL football team.

So… boo-ya.  I fucked an NFL cheerleader.

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